Reasons why I feckin deserve my bottle of wine….on a Wednesday

Why I need wine

Holy Jesus, today has tested my patience like no other day – it’s only 11am and I’ve already told myself ‘Fuck it, I’m having (& deserve) a bottle of wine tonight’. Couldn’t care less that it’s only a Wednesday and don’t care (right now) how it’s going to make me feel tomorrow, all I know is I’m having it tonight and I’m gonna bloody well enjoy it. Might also stuff me face with chocolate too – so there you have it shitty morning, how do ya like them apples ha?

So what’s the reason(s)? …. Well lets be honest, normally I need zero reasons but I happen to have a few for tonights proposed ‘one on one’ date with a bottle of happiness.

Already today, I’ve been on the receiving end of 3 tantrums of which 1 was a full blown meltdown lasting over 30 mins (in the car), 2 times told ‘I don’t want you‘, & / or ‘I’m not talking to you‘, twice told ‘I want my Mama‘, 1 x ‘I’m not getting out of the car, I’m not going to creche‘, 1 baby who refused to go to sleep and just roared crying for ages before eventually shutting her eyes over an hour later than normal which will absolutely mess up her schedule (& mine) for today, 1 webex call that just would not work and adding it’s extension to Chrome resulted in crashing my Mac which took me 45 mins to fix, 1 dog that puked in his crate over night coughing up various bits of crap (excuse the pun) that he eats daily which included some twigs/bits of bark and plastic from a toy he decided was better tasting than the very fucking expensive ‘calm’ dog food we have to buy for him and for some reason, he smelt like actual shit (which he didn’t going to bed last night).

Phouie fuckin douie – did I mention, it’s only just gone 11 am?! Holy Moly..and now breathe 🙂

Mia is normally the best girl in the world, I’m not just saying that, there are no daddy blinkers on here, it is the absolute truth. But even she has her moments and today sure as hell was one. However, her form being off is normally a tell tale sign for us that something is up, medically I mean. She recently had to have a Cystoscopy procedure as she kept on having recurring UTI’s. So she been on anti-b’s & tabs since. But in the last week ish, she’s been having accidents again so I’m worried something is wrong. So a trip to the Dr’s is looming. 

Elle is an amazing cutie, larger than life baby who is going to be cheeky & a handful but the fact of the matter is she’s tough work (tougher than Mia for sure). She cries and that is just the way she is. None of our family believe us when we tell them she roars a lot and for the most part, for no good reason. If you put her into her jumperoo, she whinges, you try to get her to sleep, she whinges, she wakes up, she whinges, put her into her car seat, she whinges, if you turn you back to do something else (like make her bottle), yep, you guessed it, she whinges. Again, no daddy blinkers on here either, it’s just the way it is….. Well that is until Elle is in company – she absolutely loves being around other people and guess what?, she doesn’t cry or whinge – unbelievable. Hence the ‘I don’t know what you’re bangin on about Ross, she’s the best behaved baby I’ve ever seen!‘ – silly me, sure I’m just making all this up for the gee!?

It goes without saying that I’ve gotten nothing else done this morning, the place is messy and it’s gonna stay that way cause now it’s time to go and collect Mia from creche (she’s there for 3 hours each day) and baby Elle is just waking up as I type (see below & get this, ironically NOT crying – FFS !!!!!)

Elle waking up - NOT crying!
Elle waking up – NOT crying!

So let’s be optimistic here, today WILL get better – yep, that’s a better mindset – but so far it’s been the biggest test of my SAHD skills since I started over 2 months ago I’ll tell ya. But think about it, 1 shitty morning in 8 / 9 weeks? That tells it’s own story about how amazing my two girls normally are so I’ll happily take that.

Still having a bottle of wine tonight but – yeah baby 🙂

** BTW – if any of the cardiac medical team who looked after me in hospital happen to read this, by a ‘bottle’ I do of course mean ‘4 units’ & by ‘bar of chocolate’ I do of course mean ‘2 squares’ !



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