He Said / She Said – Bloggers Ed #4 This Mums Life

He Said / She Said #4 This Mum's Life


“It’s Wednesday so that must mean it’s time for some mid-week giggles because it’s #HeSaidSheSaidWed time! So put the nips to sleep, grab a tasty beverage and like I always say – ‘hold onto your shit folks’ cause here comes another cracker #4!”

Hey! Fancy getting involved? Yeah? Click the magic button & take your seat!

The Stented Papa & The Stented Missus

SAY HI TO Lucy FROM This mum’s life !

He Said / She Said This Mums Life LogoI am officially made up, to be asked to take part in this awesome series! I don’t know Ross IRL (‘In Real Life’, for anyone who doesn’t speak Twat,) but I love his blog, and I get the impression that he’s just a bloody great bloke.

And he has a fucking awesome beard-and you can always judge a guy by his non ironic, non hipster, bloody awesome beard. (Disclaimer: if you shave it off Ross, I’m sure you’ll still be an all around good guy, and funny as shit!)

My name is Lucy, and I blog at This Mum’s Life! I’ve been on the blog slog for nearly two years now, and I mainly blog about the ridiculous things that happen to me as a parent, as well as some more serious stuff, like postnatal anxiety/depression. Hopefully there’s a good balance of comedy and deep.


Anyhoo, I chose cleaning because I had a post about it figured out in my head immediately, which I thought would be quite amusing. I knew the imaginatively named Mr W would be well on board to share his side of the story-and he was!

So let’s do this, crazy party people! Do I get to say ‘Ya Bollox’ during this?? (The Stented Papa says ‘Oh hell yeah ya do‘!!) Hopefully, because it’ll make me feel like a female James Nesbitt, and there will be something really satisfying about referring to Mr W as ‘Ya Bollox’ (contextually correct?!)

He Said She Said Woman from VenusShe said….

When I married Mr W, I insisted that we bring our boys up in a feminist household, with open lines of communication regarding our 50:50 shared division of labour-naturally including cleaning.

Therefore, you can clearly see that I set a ridiculously easy question for Mr W, when I asked him ‘and tell the dear readers, where do we keep our cleaning products, darling?’ His response? ‘Fuck knows-somewhere in the utility?’


As you can see, I was having a real chortle there, because our lives are bloody Victorian! The clear division of labour in our household is that Mr W goes to work, and I do everything else.

Ok, so let’s break this down… I grew up in a household where cleaning was pretty much the priority-my mum was fab, but I think me and my brother only just made it to first place in the priority ranking, with cleaning taking a reluctant second.

I used to taunt her with tales of how I was going to move out and live like a total sloth-just to rebel against her extremist cleaning views. Before we had children, there was occasional sloth behaviour, but I ended up mainly keeping everything up to a good standard.

then arrived the children!

However, since the children came along, I have one, standard cleaning policy: Shove all the mess into cupboards when somebody is coming over, chuck bleach down the toilets when I remember (or if people are coming over,) and run a disinfectant wipe over any available surface, between evening Netflix and wine binges!

My mum contributes to trying to improve this policy, when she visits weekly to judge help out. She can’t resist donning the marigolds and making the house just that bit shinier-albeit for just the rest of that day.

This needs to change, because our lovely house is slowly going to shit-but it all comes down to that valuable commodity…time. When I have more, I will pass my Dirty Mummy baton to someone else, and resume mid to top range level cleaning duties-all the while coercing Mr W to help the fuck out. ‘Ya Bollox’!

He Said She Said Man from MarsHe Said…  

I think asking me where the cleaning stuff was kept, wasn’t the best opening question-it could be stuffed in any of the cupboards you shove things in when people are coming over-I’m calling bullshit on that question!

FYI-It’s been in the same cupboard for five years darling, but if you want to call bullshit-that’s fine! This is an open, secure space, to express our feelings!

Anyway, I can fully remember cleaning the toilets that time Lucy had campylobacter, and was really ill.

Ok! Not sure people need to hear about me having the worst upset stomach ever, for months. That was also legit, like 7 years ago.

Anyway, I’d do it if I really needed to, and Lucy’s mum gets all OCD about it most of the time, and does it for us? I agree that the shoving things into cupboards when people are coming over, isn’t the best strategy. Lucy says that she can’t possibly get stuff done around the house in the day, because of the children. I’ll chuck a grenade and run here-I don’t actually know whether this is true or not…

Ya Bollox.

I think time is definitely the thing here-we do agree on that. When Lucy has more time, it’ll just get done, won’t it??! And as I’ve just been punched in the arm, I will add quickly, that I will do more than just clean the toilet when someone has campylobacter…!

Is this sharing the load enough for you?! I think we both have the same expectations about what we want the house to look like, and both put it to the bottom of our priorities.

And the boys make a monumental mess in the toilet most days-I’m not sure how tiny boys create enough poo that would make an elephant feel inferior-it would be nice not to come home to constant splashed pans and floaters that no matter what happens, just won’t bloody flush!

I think we should just get a cleaner.

Conclusion: I want the house to look like it does when my mum has cleaned it, all of the time. Mr W wants the same, but does nothing to maintain it. Yes-we’ll just get a cleaner…!

….. Ya Bollox!!!


Agh ha ha, brilliant! I loved this post, very funny and  so identifiable. And Lucy, you are a woman after my own heart – I love to throw in a few swear words into my posts and I’ve used the exact same phrase ‘Ya Bollox‘ in some of my own posts! So this was a winner for me the moment I read it.

(Also 10 out of 10 for the intro paragraph, flattery will always be a winner with me hehe)!!

OK so folks, make sure you pop over and check out Lucy’s brilliant blog  ‘This Mum’s Life‘. She is also co-host of a linky I’ve been a fan of since day one called #BigPinkLink. And if you’re not already following her socially,  what are you waiting for?! Twitter / Facebook / Instagram.

Thank you both – Lucy & Mr W – for taking part in our #HeSaidSheSaidWed series #niceone!


#5 in the series features a fellow Irish Dad blogger who’s helped me out a lot since I’ve started blogging and with a family of 4, I haven’t a clue how he gets the time! It’s only Alan from OMG It’s a Girl!

So make sure you’ve added your email & subscribed to The Stented Papa so you won’t miss out! (that’s a plug…..yeah it’s defo a plug 🙂  ).


Well then join the party – sign up takes 2 mins !!


20 Comments Add yours

  1. Ah cleaning…the bane of my life, the thing I leave and leave to the point where I wonder if the local health authority will come and officially condemn my house, before remembering that I now live in the Mediterranean where there is no concern for health and safety. What. So. Ever. #PhewThen
    Yet when I do the cleaning, I actually erm [whispers]…rather *cough* enjoy it (sssshhhhhhh don’t tell anyone) Love Lucy, good blog friend and fab writer #BigPinkLink
    absolutely prabulous would luv you to read…Absolutely Delighted to Be a # BiBs2017 Awards Finalist and Would Love Your Vote!My Profile

    1. Hey Prabs! In the days before I became a SAHD, believe me when I say, if I could leave it that long I absolutely!! These days, I’m a lot better but I do NOT enjoy it one little bit. I do however, like the end product of having a clean place and being able to take the praise that goes with it!!!! Love that you life in Malta. I’ve never been but have always had a soft spot for it for some unknown reason.Just did the following thing too so thanks for reading & commenting. Ross #HeSaidSheSaidWed #BigPinkLink

  2. Aleena Brown says:

    Bloody brilliant!! Mr C (also very imaginatively named) would never say it but I’m sure he thinks I do diddly squat all day! He absolutely loves to run in my face on my weekly Saturday excursion from the house (to Fat club btw) that he’s managed to do ALL the housework. Never mind that I usually get home around 12 to 2 very much undressed children who have vaguely had a bit of food thrown at them while they watch My Little Pony on repeat. I’m happy for this routine to continue, as long as he always does ALL the housework!! Brilliant!! #bigpinklink

    1. Jesus, I can tell you since becoming a SAHD over 15 months ago – doing diddly squat is 1,000,000 % NOT what we do!!!! Mr C trust me on this my man. I write this post a few weeks after becoming a SAHD, Mr C should read it!! http://thestentedpapa.com/2016/04/25/day-in-the-life-of-a-sahd/. Housework is not my best friend nor my strong point. But it has to be ‘done’. Done meaning to my standard which I can tell you is not The Stented Missus standard! Thanks for reading & commenting Aleena. Cheers Ross #HeSaidSheSaidWed #BigPinkLink (BTW I just followed you on everything!)

  3. Hahah I love this, Ya Bollox is definitely going down in my memory bank of epic phrases to bring out at just the right moment! Love this series, really made me laugh – thank you! #bigpinklink
    five little doves would luv you to read…Joie Stages Isofix -from birth to 7 yearsMy Profile

    1. Agh stop, it’s one of my favourite sayings and one I try to use anywhere possible (within context of course!!) otherwise I’d be the Bollox hahaha. Delighted you love the series! Make sure you subscribe to my blog and have every future #HeSaidSheSaidWed post dropped into your inbox! (that’s a feckin plug if I ever saw it ha?!!!) Cheers! Ross. #Bigpinklink

  4. Cleaning is such a bug bare of mine. I love a clean house but then when its lived in it gets messy. Definitely wish I could afford a cleaner!! #bigpinklink

    1. When The Missus suggested we get a cleaner, I thought she was pulling the piss. It was alien to me. But I can honestly say I’m converted. If you can work the cash to get one, I’d highly suggest it. I hate cleaning but I do like the house after it’s been cleaned (just not by me!!). Thanks for commenting! Ross #BigPinkLink

  5. Love this! I’ve always enjoyed Lucy’s blog but it’s brilliant to be hear what Mr W wants too. Why is cleaning always such an issue? I think most couples feel the same way – they want it done and to look like their mum did it, but no one wants to or is able to get on with it. I’m with you Lucy – bleach round the toilet, antibacterial wipe around the surfaces and then shove everything else in the cupboard! #BigPinkLink
    Cheryl @ Tea or Wine would luv you to read…Interview With My Mum The AuthorMy Profile

    1. Haha, I like both yours & Lucy’s style! Quick & easy and job done! Then have your tea or wine as the case maybe!! Thanks a million for commenting. Delighted you loved it. Ross #BigPinkLink #HeSaidSheSaidWed

  6. This is hilarious – I love the He Said/She said series. And our system is exactly the same – my own mother despairs of my lack of domesticity but Mr S.H.I.T. seriously did ask me how to work the washing machine not that long ago – I kid you not. #bigpinklink

    1. Hi ya Susie. So glad you love our series, thanks a million. But trust me, I think your name is feckin genius. S.H.I.T !!!! Ever time I see it, I just laugh internally. It’s just class. Yeah Mum’s can bring that ‘oh, so that’s how you clean up!’ vibe with them sometimes. I have to say, even I know how to work the washing machine Mr S.H.I.T (see, there I go laughing again – brilliant!!!). Thanks for reading Susie. Ross #BigPinkLink #HeSaidSheSaidWed

  7. Feel’s funny commenting on the #BigPinkLink host post when the post in a guest post on my own blog hahahaha but Lucy’s blog is absolutely brilliant. Made me laugh hard. ‘Ya Bollox’ is one of my top two favourite sayings ever so when I saw it included it was an instant winner for me. And I love the fact that Mr W got stuck right in and got involved, fair play to ya Mr.!! Quality post Lucy, thanks so much for being part of #HeSaidSheSaidWed 🙂 #BigPinkLink

    (…..right, I’m off now to reply to my own comment hahahaha 🙂 )
    The Stented Papa would luv you to read…He Said / She Said – Bloggers Ed #4 This Mums LifeMy Profile

  8. Heather Keet says:

    I’m in favor of getting a cleaner. I had one for a time when I was working and it was such a load off. She did bathrooms and floors, the two jobs that always made me cranky. #bigpinklink

    1. Our cleaners were here earlier today actually. They come every second Thursday and the place (for a few hours anyway!) is tidy, clean & smells good. The clothes are ironed & the beds have fresh sheets. Worth €50? Hell yeah. And just to be clear, I am a ‘cleaner convert’. When the Stented Mrs first said she was thinking of getting a cleaner, I nearly spat me coffee out everywhere!! Thanks Heather. #BigPinkLink

  9. fancy says:

    Ya Bollix being my favourite expression, I love this piece☺ heehee

    1. Agh stop! It’s 100% my favourite expression. ‘Ya Bollox Ya’ is also up there! Glad you liked it. Come back again please!!! Thanks Ross.

  10. Luuuucccyyyyy! I bloody love you I do. And this series. Love that too! I’m now setting myself a personal mission to include “Ya bollox” in at least 10 conversations tomorrow. (I’m at work. Not just at home with the small humans. That would be inappropriate and totally wouldn’t happen.) *coughs* 😉 x

    1. Hahahaha, I think ‘Ya Bollox’ is probably the most under-used phrase around but why? It’s such a class expression. ‘Agh ya bollox ya’ hehehe!! I was telling Lucy about this Side note – yrs back when working in a pub in Dublin, we would either use ‘Ya Bollox Ya’ when someone said something stupid. Then it progressed onto the much ‘classier’ ‘Ya Prrriick’ !!!!! to pretty much anything that was said by anyone else (staff I mean, not to the customers hahaha can ya image….

      Customer: ‘Hey, pint of Bulmers please’
      Me: ‘Sure no worries……Ya Prrrick’


      So ‘Ya Bollox’ is right up there for me – along with ‘Ya Prrrick’ or ‘Agh ya Prick with ears’ is a good one two!!!

      Thanks a million Dawn, chat soon, Ross

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