He Said / She Said – Bloggers Ed #13 Ask Yer Father

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“It’s Wednesday so lets do this! Welcome back to He Said / She Said – The Bloggers Ed folks. Don’t know about you, but time is just flying by and before I know it, it’s Wednesday again. Good news in the sense that you know you don’t have to wait for too long before the next instalment in the series! So settle in & settle down for this weeks post!”

Hey! Fancy getting involved? Yeah? Click the magic button & take your seat!”

The Stented Papa & The Stented Missus

SAY HI TO Adam FROM Ask Yer Father

Hi, Adam herAsk Your Father logo He Said / She Said The Bloggers Ede from Ask Yer Father and my wife Caroline – she’s on twitter as @askyermother.

First thing to say is that after reading everyone else’s contributions to the series, I’m amazed how similar we all are. There are clear patterns emerging.

My attitude to cleaning, tidying and organising is very like Daddy Poppins, get it done as quickly as possibly but life is too short to suck out all the enjoyment in life. Funnily enough, now that I’m the house husband, it’s me that’s getting more anal about everything being organised and tidy and the wife that’s a bit more lax.

Maybe rather than being about the sexes, it’s more to do with who is in the home and getting no bloody recognition after trying and failing to get things done.

Anyway, onto the organisation!


For our piece on ‘He Said / She Said – The Bloggers Ed‘ we chose ‘He Organises / She Organises‘.

He Said She Said Bloggers Ed Man from MarsHe Said:

I’m not brilliant at organising to be honest but things still happen. I’m more of a hands on ‘doer‘ – ‘lets have a last minute dash and everything still gets done‘ kind of guy, where as my wife is military about it, gets stuck in and totally focused.

She’s more clinical with lists, lists and lists for lists. This ties into our attitude more generally, I’m the more emotional one and she’s more clinical, more of an observer. Together we make a whole.

One thing were we really diverge is that I’m more of a big picture, aesthetics kind of guy where as she’ll only see the minute details.

This is really apparent when it comes to organising the house

She’ll be into keeping the house clean, dishes washed, stairs swept etc but she is totally blind to clutter, which wrecks my head.

As long as the dishes are done and the floors hovered, she doesn’t mind that you can’t see the floors for all the clutter, she’s happy to have all the things she needs in the kitchen lined up on the shelves or worktops, to hand, practical even if it does look messy.

She needs clutter as her stuff is an extension of her, and it’s not cluttered to her because she knows where everything is. I’m fast becoming the opposite. I want to be able to walk around the house without zig zagging. I just see stuff and it overloads my brain.

He Said / She Said Bloggers Ed Woman from VenusShe said:

This is true. I like lists, it helps you get things done.

Adam even laughs because my diary is just lists without any of what he calls ‘emotional stuff‘. I don’t see the clutter so much as I don’t want to live in a show home and it’s all important stuff to us and the kids.

Having a small house, there just isn’t enough space to put everything neatly away and I’d rather spend time with my family than be obsessed with cleaning in case the queen (or my mother in-law) calls in.

Everyone I know who has a seemingly tidier house either stays up until midnight cleaning or has an extra room they can ram everything into, so I’m not going to apologise about the clutter. Besides, if Adam was better organised and used lists more, he’d got more organised and therefore done 🙂 . Oh and got off his phone more (he said: she does have a point!).

Adam can get bothered that the bookshelves are unorganised, looking cluttered and untidy with all sorts of things shoved on them but won’t notice he’s standing on crushed cheerio’s and dog hair (he said: I’d tidy up the crushed Cheerios but by the time I’ve picked up all the stuff to hover, I’ve lost the will to live).


If we’re on holiday, I like to know what we’re doing (a list is handy for that) where as Adam is happy to ‘see how it goes‘! I’ll have lists going for days before a holiday, Adam will fling everything into a bag on the morning (he said: Yes but it’s all still there, no need for over-planning).

Then again, if we’re organising a holiday (or buying anything), Adam will over analyse everything until he’s more confused than ever, whereas I’ll just buy something and be done.

Both said:

Mars & Venus He Said She Said Bloggers EdWhat we both agree on is the time factor. We’re both busy people, working, running around after the kids and trying to give them days out and spend time together.

In our parents generation there was usually one parent at home organising and keeping things going. Us kids would be kicked out to fend for ourselves while (usually) the mother would be left home to keep the house organised and the family working.

Those days are gone, thank goodness, what’s left is prioritising what time we do have and  both of us feel that organising family time together is more important than keeping up with the Joneses and what ‘people might think if they looked through the window‘.

(Speaking of parents, isn’t it funny how Mother-in-Laws seem to play a part in this entire series?!)

Cheers for letting us take part Ross,

Adam and Caroline.


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2 Comments Add yours

  1. Haha I’m more worried about my mother dropping in than my mother in law, my mother in law tells me I’m too tidy and she can’t relax in my super clean house. Go figure!

    1. I guess the saying ‘You can’t please all of the people all of the time’ springs to mind!! How is it possible to not be able to relax in a clean house?! Thanks for reading Mac! Cheers, Ross

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